Self Love & Confidence on Valentine's Day
Let's talk confidence.
I lack it.
I don't say that to be self-depricating. It's simply a fact.
I'm 5 weeks into my 16-week prep for my first NPC bikini competition. I've heard so much how there's more to it than macros (food) and working out - it'll test your self esteem, commitment, willpower, confidence, food guilt, and overall self image.
Turns out that's true and starting from a place of average-at-best confidence is a challenge. It was around week 4 when I cried about the whole thing. Yes, it is my dream and absolute goal to compete and I will see it through before I'm 30. But still, I cried. I was leaning over to get something in my closet and noticed my "pudge" (don't be annoyed I used that word for myself, this is about SELF image). I felt that within 4 weeks of prep that should not be happening. In reality though, I just need to trust the process and trust my coach. Anyway, right after that moment in my closet my fiance walked in my room and I told him how I was feeling.
He suggested taking picture so that I could see the progress he knows I've made. Here's that photo:
Obliques. I see obliques here. So that was exciting. But then I realized what the situation said of my self image and confidence and it wasn't good so I cried a little bit more about that. Just little tears, not bawling. And now it's hard sharing this with the world (or rather, my small blog following). But here's the great thing - I AM making progress and I WILL make more. One day, you'll see a six-pack (even if it's just a soft six-pack) in a photo just like this one.
Here's the lesson: Don't be so hard on yourself.
Put in the work and "trust the process."
So now that I've accepted that lesson and moved on, it's Valentine's day when couples go out to dinner and a movie and indulge in chocolates (as they well should). Today is what cheat meals are for. While my fiance and I won't be doing that, I won't be denying myself a delicious dinner. We'll be having steak, steak fries, and shaved brussels sprouts at home (nothing inherently unhealthy if cooked right) and doing whatever is in our February DateBox. I believe there is a sweet treat and free movie in there. I don't make money if you follow that link, it's just a really cool/fun subscription to do with your SO :) Our first box was Escape Room-themed and so much fun! Let me know if you try it!
If you know me or have read enough of my blog posts, you know I'm a Starbucks/Dunkin Donuts/Unhealthy-Sugary-Latte fiend. It was like 2 weeks ago when I saw Starbucks had a new Cherry Mocha Frapp and decided right then and there that I would be treating myself to one on Valentine's Day as a "cheat treat." It was worth every gram of fat and carbs. Oh, and it was free thanks to their their reward app. All around, it was a great Valentine's morning. Self love can be loving what you see in the mirror, boasting your accomplishments, and indulging in an unnecessary drink.
Let's commiserate and celebrate together. What do you struggle with? How do you practice self love and self care? What's your go-to cheat/treat meal? Email me here!